TFF Quick-Tips: Wedding Budget Fixes

Welcome back to The Friday Five!

Today we're talking ways to reduce the cost of your wedding with these 5 tips:

1. Trim the guest list. This is probably the most popular tip but it's true. Trimming down your guest list can be a touchy subject but it's basic math - the less people the lower the overall cost. Start by talking to your fiancé and your families. You don't want to offend anyone. Ask politely about that second cousin you've never met and explain your budget concerns. Communication with those involved is key especially if they are helping with cost.

*Bonus tip: you don't HAVE to give everyone a +1 but DO be consistent with it

2. Wedding Brunch. We've talked about the wedding off-season before. Not only can the off-season be a less expensive time to tie the knot but sometimes a different time of day can be too. A daytime wedding can be fun and everyone loves brunch. Am I right? Your guests don't have to know it was a budget conscious decision. Have fun with it!

3. Buy your dress used. That's right! Check out our previous blog post to learn more. 

4. Multi-use decor. Choose floral arrangements that can be moved from your ceremony site and repurposed as decor at your reception. Think about where the bridal party can place their bouquets - those little beauties should not go to waste either. Your florist should have some more great ideas as well.

*Bonus Idea: Place cards that double as favors

5. The signature cocktail. I don't have to tell you booze for a party is expensive and you certainly don't want your guests to have to pay for anything while attending your event. An open bar of beer, wine and a signature cocktail of your choice can still be a hit. It's personalized yet budget friendly.

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We hope these tips helped with some of your budget dilemmas. If you'd like us the elaborate on any of these tips or have any tips of your own please leave them in a comment below.

Happy weekend & as always, happy planning!
xo.

Understanding Wedding Floral Costs

Flowers are a pretty ubiquitous component of a wedding. While creative replacements for floral have become trendy over the past few years (i.e., a brooch bouquet), most brides still choose to feature flowers as the highlight of their wedding decor.

However, when it comes to wedding planning, it can be difficult to guess what all this will cost. After all, even if you've thrown a big event before with floral centerpieces, etc., you've probably never accounted for things like bouquets, boutonnieres, pew / alter flowers, etc. The extent of these things all play into how much you are likely to spend, along with a few other factors.

 

Flowers by stem

So, what determines the final floral bill?

• How many flowers are used. A simple spray of baby's breath or a handful of tulips is going to be much less expensive than a large bouquet featuring different flowers in an elaborate design. 
• This also applies to the number of floral pieces you require. For example, are you just having bouquets, boutonnieres, and a few centerpieces? Or are you planning to have aisle flowers, flower girl baskets, and more extensive floral decor?
• How ornate are the designs you've selected? Bunching a group of roses into a bouquet is much simpler than having an elegant, creative bouquet, such as the one below:

Nancy Krause Floral Design


• Have you chosen seasonal floral or will the flowers you've selected have to be shipped in from far away?
• What types of flowers have you chosen? Again, there's a big difference between daisies and orchids.
• Delivery and set-up

Fleur

It's important to have an idea of what you want and need before talking with a potential floral vendor. They'll be able to give you an idea of costs based on your ideas, and then you can add or subtract from there. It's helpful to have a book of inspiration photos (or a Pinterest page!) as well. Showing a florist a specific design that you like will help them estimate what something like that would cost for you.

The Guest List: Part Two

Once you have your guest list “rules” set, and your maximum number of invitees determined, you can start building your Master Guest List. You’re going to want an Excel workbook for this one – it’s a doozy.

The fact is, weddings are generally family events. That means that not only will you and your spouse-to-be be coming up with lists of your nearest and dearest to invite, it also means both your parents are going to want to have some input as well.

Let’s say you have a pretty traditional family framework where you and your significant other both have one set of parents. Create a tab on your spreadsheet for you, your partner, your parents, and their parents. On each tab, create the following columns: Guest Names, Number, Attending?, and Priority.

Guest names (first and last) and number (how many per invite) are self-explanatory. As is Attending? – a yes or no will suffice here and help you keep track of guest numbers as responses come in. Priority is part of the initial planning process, however. This is where you must determine your A, B, and C invitees.

Inevitably, when you first put together your lists, you will be over your allotted number of attendees. Having everyone designate their guests by A (must invite), B (would like to invite), and C (want to invite only if there’s room). You should specify to everyone that A’s should be limited to family members and very close friends – the people that you couldn’t imagine not being there. The majority of your guests will fall into groups B and C.

It will help everyone if you give them a general number to shoot for in terms of invitees. For example, if you’re shooting for a 150 person wedding, allot the two of you 75 guests, and split the difference remaining between your parents. Or, just go for it… the next step is trimming the guest list, anyway!

Next up: Trimming the Guest List and Other Tips

Previously: The Guest List - Part One

The Guest List: Part One

After the big picture budget decisions have been made, and perhaps after you’ve selected your wedding venue, the next important step is to determine your guest list. Doing this early on in the wedding planning process will ensure you don’t have to make any uncomfortable decisions later on when you realize that you’ve over-invited for your budget or the restrictions of your venue space!

We’ll  break the Guest List question into three separate posts, because, frankly, it’s a big process. First, we have to go back to the budget question – this is where your guest lists begins and ends. The bulk of your budget, if you remember from our previous posts, will be spent on food and beverage, so it’s this number that we’ll use as a starting point.

You’ll need to do a little preliminary research to figure this out. Caterers will price out food & beverage per person, so if you have an idea of what per person amount you’re looking to spend, that can help you determine your guest list number. Alternatively, if you don’t have that number in mind, take your overall Catering budget and divide it by the number of people you think you’d like to invite. Where does that leave you? Just know that the more people you invite, the smaller this number will become… and the less flexibility you will have with your caterer.

Another factor to take into consideration is your venue space. If you’ve already signed a contract for a particular venue, they most likely have outlined the limitations, in terms of number of people for different types of events, of their space. For example, for a seated dinner reception, a space may be able to fit 150 people. However, this number may increase if you’re only looking to do a cocktails & appetizers event with passed food and limited seating. Either way, this will set the upper threshold of how many people you can invite.

There are a few other general decisions you should make right off the bat, before even writing down any names. Some suggestions:

1)      Will you be inviting children? If not, will some children be included (i.e., your immediate nieces / nephews or flower girls / ring bearers?)

2)      Will you be inviting co-workers? If so, where do you draw the line? A good rule of thumb is usually not to invite anyone you don’t socialize with outside of the office.

3)      Will you be inviting plus-ones for everyone? If someone is in a long-term relationship, you should invite their significant other, even if they aren’t married or engaged. However, what about other single guests? Will it differ by person (i.e., will single members of your bridal party get an “and guest” invite, but not other attendees?)

Once you’ve got a general number and your “rules” established as a baseline, you can start creating lists of actual people to invite! 

Next up: Determining your Master List and Prioritizing Guests

Budget Tips: Wedding BYOB

Considering that the food and beverage cost for your wedding will be the largest overall expense, it makes sense to think about ways to trim this portion of your budget… without sacrificing service and style, of course!

More and more couples, thus, are choosing to buy their own alcohol (rather than order a package through their caterer or venue) for the festivities. Certainly, having the caterer manage this is much more convenient and spares you from having to make additional decisions about what to serve and how much. However, for the budget conscious, BYOB wedding booze may be a great option. Even if you go this route, the caterer can still provide the bartender (and glassware, napkins, stirrers, etc.) as a part of your contract.



First, you need to have a good estimate of guest attendance. Next, you need to determine what types of beverages are important to you to serve. You can stick with beer & wine, or go for a full-bar, but the more you include, the more it will cost. Other questions to ask:

-          How many hours will you be serving drinks?

-          Do you want to have a champagne toast?

-          If you’re serving liquor, do you want this for before / after-dinner only or for the whole evening?

-          How much do your friends and family like to drink? (Seriously – this is important to know!)

Next – tally it up to figure out quantities. There’s a great wedding alcohol calculator here that makes the math easy, if that’s not your thing.

Call a few local stores (large liquor stores, grocery stores, and even club stores) to get a rough estimate of pricing. Some stores even deliver, but you can also pick up. Just get it to your venue, and make sure that whomever you hired to bartend knows where to find it and what they need to do.

The other bonus of buying your own? If you have a surplus at the end of the evening, it comes back to you! Nothing wrong with starting out your married life with a nicely stocked bar and fridge.

Who Pays for What, Traditionally

These days, people pay for their weddings in a myriad of different ways. For some, the bride’s parents foot the bill. For others, both parents contribute. However, for a larger and larger percentage of couples, it’s the brides and grooms themselves who pay for the festivities – about 30% in 2011[i]. There is no right or wrong approach in 2012.

However, there was a time when traditional etiquette dictated who paid for what. I recently came across a couple different lists that outlined all the expenses of getting married and who should pay for what. I imagine most modern couples are flexible and not expecting to stick to such a stringent list of guidelines, but that being said, I still found it interesting to read.

For example, you can probably guess that the “Bride’s Father” (always indicated as the father in these lists, naturally) is traditionally responsible for the bulk of the wedding expenses. After all, women used to come with a “dowry” that would consist of various amounts of money or property to be passed to her husband on marriage, and this tradition likely is an extension of that. So, according to etiquette, the Bride’s Father pays for the ceremony and all the reception expenses, among other things.

However, some things do traditionally fall on the Groom or the Groom’s Father’s shoulders. I was surprised to learn that according to these “rules”, the Groom pays for things like the Bride’s bouquet, boutonnieres for the groomsmen, the marriage license, and the honeymoon. Additionally, and I think this is still pretty common among couples splitting the wedding costs in a traditional way, the Groom’s family pays for the rehearsal dinner.

In our contemporary reality, it seems that these rules are hopelessly out of date. Sure – a Bride’s parents may still want to host the wedding, and that’s great. A Groom’s parents may want to host the rehearsal dinner – wonderful! However, couples should go into their wedding planning with a flexible mindset. If both sets of parents want to contribute to all events, why turn that down? Also, as couples get married later in their twenties and early thirties, it’s reasonable to assume that they would take on a large percentage of the costs themselves.

Etiquette certainly still has a place in this world – and certainly in wedding planning. Nonetheless, there’s a difference between modern etiquette and out-dated rules based on things like the assumption that women belong to their fathers or their husbands, and come pre-packaged with a “bride price”!

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[i] Brides Magazine

Setting a Wedding Budget: Part Three

So, you’ve determined your overall budget, found your vendors, and figured out how much of that budget you can allocate to each. Now you need to start putting down deposits, tracking payments, and managing to those budgets you set!

Tracking your spending through the wedding planning process is the key to keeping your sanity in check. It may not come naturally to you to be this meticulous about where your money goes, to the dollar, but doing due diligence here actually allows you flexibility in the long run.

The first step is to create a spreadsheet workbook that lists all your vendors down a column. Then, you’ll add rows for Budget, Actual Proposed / Contract Cost, Deposit, Payment 2, Final Payment etc. and Payment Dates (Due Dates and Actual Paid Dates). You can even add columns for Who Paid and Payment Method, in case you’re splitting these costs with others or paying with combination of checks and credit cards.

When you sign a contract with a vendor, you’ll put down a deposit right away. This ensures you have locked down the date with the vendor, and also the specifics outlined in your contract. It also acts as a safeguard for the vendor so that if you cancel after they’ve put in work and reserved that date for you, they aren’t completely at a loss, financially.

Next payments vary by vendor. With a caterer, you may put down a second payment, and then a final payment on your wedding day. With others, you may just have the deposit and then the final payment. However it plays out, make sure you have logged the due dates for these payments, and add them to your calendar.

You may find that when all is said and done, the final amount you pay a vendor may be more or less than what you originally thought from your contract. This is where staying flexible comes in. When you’re tracking your payments, you know how much above or below your budget you are at any given time. This allows you to, if necessary, add an extra hour to your musician contract or invite an extra 20 people to your wedding later on. If you know exactly where things stand, financially, you’ll know just what you can or cannot afford.

Once your big day has past, you can refer back to this document one last time to shore up any remaining payments due that didn’t get taken care of the day of. You’ll also be able to see how much leftover you have in your budget… and maybe apply that to some fruity honeymoon cocktails?

Setting a Wedding Budget: Part Two

Once you have your big-picture budget figure in mind for your wedding, it's important that you break down how much you want to spend in each category. Unless you're intimately familiar with the wedding planning industry or have been married before, it's hard to begin to know what different things cost and how much you should plan to spend on them within your overall budget figure.


Below is a starting point of the percent of your total budget you can expect to spend on these major vendor categories. It's a starting point because ultimately how you manage your total budget is up to you and based on YOUR priorities. If you're a foodie, and having stellar food offerings at your reception is a number one priority for you, you may choose to spend more in this category and cut back in others. So, the first question to ask yourself is "what's most important to me?". You can then adjust from there.

Percent of Budget by Vendors


Caterer: 40-50%
Food and Beverage is by far the biggest expense for your wedding.


Venue: 10-15%


Floral: 4-7%


Photography: 4-7%


Music: 7-10%


Of course, there are many other categories that will take up smaller percentages of your budget: paper/stationery, wedding planning/design, your dress and accessories, the cake, etc. Again, depending on what's important to you, and what you are planning to include on your big day, you'll want to get a starting number in mind for each as you begin to request proposals from vendors.


Being Realistic


Since most brides do not know what to expect about vendor costs going into wedding planning, it's common to not understand why certain things cost as much as they do. Let's take catering, for an example. How does the cost of a wedding caterer break down? Here's a hint: it's not just the cost of food you're paying for!

• Food and Beverage: This is usually at a cost per person.
• Equipment: Anything the caterer needs to prep and serve.
• Staff: The people - from cooks to coordinators - that need to be on hand to execute.
• Delivery Charge: Covers the cost of getting everything to your event venue.

Obviously, a good vendor is going to try to work within your budget parameters. However, it's important to remember that different vendors offer different levels of service, and you really do get what you pay for. There's only so much cost cutting you can try to do with a vendor before you're going to be in a situation where the quality of service might be compromised. They can't work like that, and you wouldn't want that anyway!

Next Up: Part 3: Keeping Track of Expenses & Being Flexible


Missed Part 1? Read it here.

Setting a Wedding Budget: Part One

Congratulations – you’re getting married! Now is the time to get down to business actually planning this wedding thing, right? Unfortunately, there has to be a practical side to tying the knot, and most of the planning process revolves around one nasty word: budget.

Whether you’re someone who thrives on financial planning in your everyday life or not, having a wedding budget determined in advance of planning is essential. There are multiple components of this budget as well – it’s not just a big lump sum figure. You can start out that way, but then you’re going to have to drill down into different categories and determine just how much you’re willing to spend on each. It can certainly be overwhelming.

So, as our inaugural post here on the Revelry Alliance blog, we’ll kick things off with Part 1 of setting your wedding budget. In the coming weeks we’ll follow up with more parts covering specifics of the budget and how to manage your wedding costs throughout the planning process.

First up? The overall budget figure and how you’ll fund the biggest day of your life so far!

source: bridalbuds

So, how much will you spend on your wedding?

The average cost of a wedding in the U.S. is over $27,000. This figure can be higher (or much higher) in big cities, so if you live in a place like Chicago or New York, that’s important to keep in mind. However, more important than averages and statistics is what you can afford.

The first question to ask is who will be contributing, financially, to your wedding. Is it just you and your groom-to-be? Will your parents be picking up the tab? His parents? A combination of you and them? If there are any other people involved between you and your future spouse, this is a discussion you must have upfront before even beginning to day-dream about locations and dresses.

Once you know who else will be contributing, and how much, you can determine what you’ll be paying, if anything, out of your own pocket. The amount from others may be sufficient, or you may want to supplement with your own funds. Either way, combine the two figures to understand what your total lump sum is, and then go from there.

An important thing to keep in mind when accepting money from others is how you’ll manage payments to vendors under this scenario. As the bride, you’ll likely be doing the majority of the interaction with vendors. Will you pay them and get reimbursed from your parents or whomever? Or will you have them write checks or provide credit card info when appropriate?

Finally, if your parents (or others) are contributing, be sure to find out how much they want to be involved in the planning process. Unfortunately, when you have someone else paying for part or all of your wedding, you have to be ready to negotiate and listen to their opinions. It’s your day, but it’s also their money, so be sure to include them and be open to respectful discussions.

Next Up: Part 2: Budgets by Vendors – Your Priorities and Being Realistic